


Broken

by madrefiero



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Porn, Canon-adjacent, F/M, Grief/Mourning, Porn with Feelings, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Shameless Smut, Thortasha - Freeform, semi-canon, thunderwidow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 03:46:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18003197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madrefiero/pseuds/madrefiero
Summary: The first couple of days after the snap were spent in a daze. Everyone who was left was steel reeling from their losses, unable to accept it was over. It was over and the Avengers had lost. Of all of them, she told herself that she'd lost the least. Never mind that she lost most of the only family she's ever known.There was only so much one could compartmentalize before there was no room for anything else. She held herself together by a thread, stamping down her feelings, knowing that if she let herself crack at all, she would shatter. The Black Widow wouldn't shatter, no matter what Natasha Romanoff wanted to do.





	Broken

The first couple of days after the snap were spent in a daze. Everyone who was left was steel reeling from their losses, unable to accept it was over. It was over and the Avengers had lost. 

Natasha was moving on autopilot, trying to remain stoic for Clint who lost his whole family, and Wanda who he'd treated as a daughter since Sokovia. For Steve who lost Sam and T'Challa, and for the second time, Bucky. For Bruce and Pepper, who still had no word from Tony. And for Thor who lost his father, his home, his people, and his brother all in such a short time. Of all of them, she told herself that she'd lost the least. Never mind that she lost most of the only family she's ever known. 

There was only so much one could compartmentalize before there was no room for anything else. She held herself together by a thread, stamping down her feelings, knowing that if she let herself crack at all, she would shatter. The Black Widow wouldn't shatter, no matter what Natasha Romanoff wanted to do.

When the shock wore off, the nightmares began, each night a repeat of the last. Every night she relieved watching her friends, her family, fall to ash. Some nights, it was only those who were truly gone. Some nights it was only her who perished and she would wake with the taste of ash in her mouth, retching as she stumbled to the bathroom. Most nights everyone fell except her, and those were the worst. 

With Clint off the grid and James gone forever, she's taken to seeking out comfort where she can on nights like this. It's only after she wakes for the second time that night, voice hoarse from crying out for those they lost, that she slips quietly into Thor's room. Like her, he’s broken and pretending not to be. Like her, he hides his grief. It's only during the dark of night, and only with each other that they let themselves show any weakness. It's only these times that they let themselves feel anything at all.

Natasha didn't speak when she entered his room, didn't bother to lock the door, there was no one left to find them. She was pulling her shirt off when he stirred, already pulling the covers back for her. Grateful for his presence and the way they both drew comfort from each other, she straddled his hips. 

She kissed him before he could talk, making her need clear. Some nights they just held one another or talked through what happened, but tonight she just needed to feel something. She needed to feel something, anything that wasn't pain. She moved her hips, grinding her pussy against his cock, watching his face as he started to harden. She slid over his shaft easily, her hands splayed on his chest. He reached up to palm her breasts, and while normally she wanted him to touch her, she needed her head clear first.

"Just...give me a minute, please..."

Thankfully he understood what she was asked of him, somehow Thor always did.He laid back, and kept his hands to himself, without another word. Nat still hadn't taken him inside, content to grind on him until she'd pushed herself to the edge of an orgasm. 

She stopped moving then, exhaling a shaky breath to center herself while she came back down. She did this several times, pushing herself just to the brink each time, then pulling herself away. Each time she found it harder to stop than the last. Her breaths were already quick and shallow, but she needed more before she would let herself go. 

She was so aroused by the time she brought herself to the edge for the fifth time, that everywhere between his cock and belly button was covered in her slick. She panted through parted lips, red hair damp at her temples and neck. Twice more she took herself to the edge, pulling hard on her nipples when she backed down again. She never opened her eyes to look at him, just let herself feel everything and nothing at all.

Finally, she took him inside, letting out a choked cry once she had him all the way in. Fuck, she thought. This was just what she needed. She rolled her hips slowly, his thick length hitting every part of her as she moved. She wouldn't be able to hold off again. 

Natasha got up onto her heels, her knees apart as she bounced on his cock. She paid him no mind, but she knew he wasn't without pleasure. She was lost in desire, her body open and on full display for him. She reached between her legs, rubbing her clit hard and fast, fucking herself as hard as she could until she cried out in sweet release. 

She shook violently, no words leaving her lips, only needy whimpers, until she finally collapsed onto his chest. At some point her moans had turned to sobs, and Thor held her with safe, strong arms. He grounded her in a way no one else could anymore, rolling to let his weight rest on top of her. He framed her face in his hands, not moving even though he was still buried inside her, and he wouldn't until he knew she was okay. 

He pressed his lips to hers, as if he could pull the sadness out of her if only for a night. After what could have been a minute or an hour, she wrapped her legs around him. She still didn't speak, but she urged him to move, rocking her hips beneath them. 

He let her set the pace, willing to be whatever she needed for the night. Her eyes were still wet with tears when he met them, but to his relief she didn't turn away from him. They rocked together slowly, giving and taking, each of them gradually pulling the other higher. Natasha clung to him, her nails pressed into his shoulders as another orgasm took her. 

Her small frame trembled and tightened around Thor, dragging him to completion just after. Despite their slow pace they were both breathless, and Thor rested his forehead against hers. He brushed his lips against hers, then kissed away her tears 

“It's okay, Natasha. You're okay. I've got you, and you're not alone.”

**Author's Note:**

> This started as just gratuitous ThorTasha/ThunderWidow smut because I feel like it's an underrated ship. After IW, I've been a sucker for angsty, grief sex, so I decided to combine the two.


End file.
